They made you spend over a hundred dollars on a textbook. A hundred hard-earned dollars! And it’s written by a professor who has his head up an orifice only accessible by taught contortionists. You’re never going to read that textbook, because it’s poorly produced, poorly written, and exhibits the biases of this ridiculous professor who’s caught up in his own universe and can’t see reality from anything but his own bias.
The problem is, the course is required; and if you don’t take it, you don’t graduate. So here you are stuck in this stupid class with this self-important professor that’s literally fleecing you out of money you don’t have to teach you something you don’t want to learn because The Man said you have to learn it. To top it off, he puts together the most idiotic tests you’ve ever heard of. They require you to practically quote verbatim from his sleazy textbook; but you can hardly bring yourself to read it because it’s so pompous and downright inconsistent it gives you the bubble-guts.
What to do? You’ve got to pass this class, but it’s unbearable. They say the measure of an individual’s learning in college has a lot less to do with their ability to cogently understand and apply learned material, and a lot more to do with their ability to brown-nose the professor. If you agree with this biased mandate, it’s likely you’ll massage his ego and get that “A” or “B” you don’t deserve and he doesn’t deserve to give. We’ve all been in this exact spot! Anybody who’s ever been through a college has been stuck in classes like this, and been forced to deal with the ridiculousness of tyrannical potentates letting on to be professors.
So you’ve had it. You’re not going to spend a whole semester–or maybe even a whole year!–cramming from this shoddy psychological textbook that’s just a bunch of poorly re-hashed opinionated bunk from the perspective of chrome-dome McGillicutty, the tenured psych professor with a penchant for bringing the hot girls in for extra credit. No more of this noise, it’s time to cheat.
Maybe two wrongs don’t make a right, but if you’re already getting cheated and do nothing about it, technically you’re allowing yourself to be wronged into submission by a corrupt system. Sometimes revolutions have to happen. Sometimes you’ve got to cheat; in a minority of situations, this is actually the upright thing to do.
But you can’t wear an eyepatch with the lectures copied on the inside. You’re too far-sighted! And there’s no reason to write all up and down your arms, or on the back of a piece of paper slipped under the transparency in your folder. You know what does work, though?
When someone asks how to cheat in exams, this is usually their answer. The GSM-Earpiece is cutting edge technology designed to teach students not only how to cheat in exams, but how to use modernity to their advantage in an affordable manner. It’s not just how to cheat in exams, the GSM-Earpiece is how to maintain an edge in the real world.
There are good classes, and bad ones. Classes where you’re going to learn a skill that increases your capacity to think critically and get on with your life, and classes that steal your soul and force you to regurgitate a bunch of opinionated bunk about topics you could care less about and have no real application in life. There’s no reason to waste hours of your own studying for things that are just a bureaucratic placeholder to begin with.
